julliette_rose (julliette_rose) wrote,

I feel raw

Im hurting and feeling really vulnerable and Michael hasnt taken advantage of that so it naturally breeds trust. I feeling the bond divulge my deepest hurt and am met with complete indifference. Its things like this that make me wonder will he be able to be with me through the long haul. I want him so badly Im craving his baby currently but I just dont know. I want him to love me the way I need him to love me I know he does butsometimes its not enough. Maybe I need therapy I probably do actually there is trauma and hurt in this heart of mine that causes some nasty baggage. He told me about him meeting up with some girl its good that he tells me but makes me wonder none the less. Im such a pot kettle I would go out with tons of different people and not say a word and sometimes its even a bit iffy. On the most part though Im good no matter what happens my heart is his. Arturo was funny when he told me Rosey and him were dating like Id be hurt that I couldnt have him I am way more upset about Rosey Arturo even if I was free would not be the one at all. He has the money and house but lives like a teenager not to mention hes just not that academically inclined. I want someone to practice my spanish with though and Im not using the girls. I know he got those thoughts in his head when I told him I thought Rosey was cute gross mental image of them together ewwwww.
Michael and I would make a way better porn as long as I directed it of course! Random thought how cool would musical porn be Id be all over that!!!!
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